Monday, November 26, 2007

The Fastest Hookup Ever

Owning a bar sucked most of the time, but it did have its perks.  One Friday night I had a full staff and was just hanging out getting drunk.  This one chick came in occasionally, and when she did, she was always there by herself.  This night in particular I noticed her sitting in the corner by herself, so I figured I’d try to hook up with her.  Here’s how the conversation went:

“How you doing tonight?”

“Fine, what are you up to?”

“Not much, just seeing if I can get you to come home with me”

“Let’s go”

It really was that quick, I couldn’t believe it.  I was drunk as hell already, so she brought me to my house and I stumbled in the front door.  I had some boxing gloves by the door and for whatever reason decided to put them on.  I was joking around like I was going to box with her and I accidentally hit her head with a little more than the tap I intended on.  She started swearing at me and left immediately.

The entire interaction between me approaching her in the bar and her leaving my house couldn’t have been any more than 15 minutes, making it not only one of the dumber things I’ve done, but also the fastest (near) hookup ever.

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